A Brief History

It has been brought to our attention that the general populace, though well-meaning and altogether not that bad a bunch of sods, is ignorant. Ask the average citizen of their opinion of the works of Lenin, and they're likely to reply that they loved all of his albums up until Magical Mystery Tour, and that it was a shame he had to go hook up with that Yoko chick and rip the band apart. Bring up the economic theories of Marx, and the common citizen will ask you which one, Groucho or Harpo. To rectify this sad, sad reality, the KGB Ministry of Propaganda busily churns out informative and patriotic brochures, pamphlets, and newsletters to keep the public abreast of the glorious revolution taking place all around us!

It all started with the KGB Manifesto, drafted long ago by our freedom-loving forefathers. The Manifesto paints a dark picture of pre-KGB society, outlines the goals and dreams of the organization, and openly mocks the rat-gazorching frat boys. The State strongly urges all comrades to read the Manifesto at least once a day, to remind yourselves of your proud heritage. If accompanied by young children or illiterate adults, please make sure to read your own copy of the Manifesto first, and only then assist them with theirs.

In subsequent years, the Ministry of Propaganda has published a series of posters and leaflets to raise public awareness and promote a general atmosphere of fear of the unknown. First an informative (though admittedly traditional) recuitment poster was circulated. Later, as our tireless propagandists continued gnawing ever-harder on the Insane Root, the infamous Tangerine Ad made its first appearance, becoming an instant underground success. In recent years, we've arranged to have our seductive flyers (old version)inserted into the Orientation-Week folders given to every CMU freshperson, thus ensuring that they'd know right from the git-go who to be afraid of.

Finally, in the spring of 1997, Comrade Corresponding Secretary Jason Grosman established KGB's official newsletter, Pravda?. Pravda? has become a much-anticipated fixture at KGB gatherings, providing a frank and uncensored forum in which the best and most eloquent minds of the organization can...be desparately, shamelessly begged (at great length) by the editor to submit articles, ANY articles!